So I looked over at my massive followers list and I saw that all of them are women... no matter. Every woman knows about a hundred dudes and I strongly encourage you all to pass this VERY important blog post along to each and every one of them.
I played baseball for most of my life and I was a pitcher so I understand that I may have a bit of an advantage in the area of aim and accuracy. That being said, why the FUCK do most men have no idea how to get a very controllable stream of piss into a very STATIONARY toilet bowl!?!
Now I'm not talking about your bathroom at home. Please feel free to let it go like a fire hose and spray your scent all over the walls and windows of your personal space. If I happen to be at your house and have to use your bathroom... well, thats my fault for not going before I left. But if you are at work or any other public restroom and you have just finished an inspiring dance routine to "Puttin on the Ritz", at least have the FUCKING decency to grab some toilet paper clean up after yourself. There is NO amount of cleaning and hand sanitizer that can do the job right after unknowingly walking into a bathroom and having to lift a toilet seat saturated in another mans urine!
Please ladies, pass this along to every man you know... AWG out!
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
The "Elder" Post
Whoever came up with the idea of the Bluetooth device needs to be beaten over the head with a rubber mallet!
I know what you are saying... "Rubber mallet? Why are you being so kind AWG?"
In truth, I don't hold the creator of the Bluetooth fully to blame for the culture of self important, moron motherfuckers that has come to be because of this invention.
Nonetheless, with the rise of the Bluetooth revolution, we are all forced to suffer the pain of stupidity. Not only have these people decided that the call from their mom about what happened to the Captn' Crunch they got at the store last week is fucking important enough to take in the middle of dinner with the family at Applebees... But they have also decided that it is important enough for everyone in earshot to know EVERY detail of the resulting argument about why they have to put their name on all the food they buy! I DON'T CARE! No one AROUND YOU cares and I would venture to say that your mom also does not fucking care!
Talk all you want in your car... But unless you want that shit ripped off your fucking head and stomped to pieces like I was Michael Fucking Flatley on meth... Get up and take your calls outside like the rest of us.
I know what you are saying... "Rubber mallet? Why are you being so kind AWG?"
In truth, I don't hold the creator of the Bluetooth fully to blame for the culture of self important, moron motherfuckers that has come to be because of this invention.
Nonetheless, with the rise of the Bluetooth revolution, we are all forced to suffer the pain of stupidity. Not only have these people decided that the call from their mom about what happened to the Captn' Crunch they got at the store last week is fucking important enough to take in the middle of dinner with the family at Applebees... But they have also decided that it is important enough for everyone in earshot to know EVERY detail of the resulting argument about why they have to put their name on all the food they buy! I DON'T CARE! No one AROUND YOU cares and I would venture to say that your mom also does not fucking care!
Talk all you want in your car... But unless you want that shit ripped off your fucking head and stomped to pieces like I was Michael Fucking Flatley on meth... Get up and take your calls outside like the rest of us.
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